Welcome to the Important & Fugly Detective's Committee!

This week on Episode #760

The Constipated Mystery of Ol' Jolly Cast Iron Pan

For the Head Detective's eyes only!

Give Them Direction

Monsters
The Annoying Porpoises of the Constipated Cast Iron Pan
vast bitter Hobgoblin of Extermination
Constipated Serpent
Villain Motive
Greed
Starting Event
Everyone show's up with the same affliction
Random Events
A pack of wild dogs Is being kidnapped
A Rustler explodes
A Butter shipment Skips merrily
A Odor Is throwing a protest
Local Business
Jace's Vase International
jessica's Fruit Bowl Worldwide
Little's Barrel Beauty Stop
Weaver's Spice shelf R Us

Populate the World

Criminal Contacts
Donald "nice ribs"
jessica "one boy"
Timmy "fast dumplings"
Roberto "Constipated Cast Iron Pan"
Random People
Jack Boyd
Marcus Allen
Owen Little
Austin Willis
Jace Mason
Julian Weaver
Finn Ryan
Tricia Padilla
Descriptions
Dead Tired
Consultant
Indifferent
Animator
Cleaner

MISC Ideas

Magical Objects
Chastity Belt of Extermination
Pants of Obsession
Secret objects
Secret Vase
Barrel with a False bottom
Random objects
Spice shelf
Tea Pot
Barrel
Tapestry
Locations
Borough
Sanctuary
Peninsula
City
Destinations
Town of Dinhamside
City of Ramde Creek

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).