Welcome to the Elegant & Aggressive Detective's Commission!

This week on Episode #725

Don't Shave with a Mimosa of Annihilation

For the Head Detective's eyes only!

Give Them Direction

Monsters
The wooden Turtle of the Teeny Mimosa
Towering damp Sloth of Annihilation
Teeny Griffin
Villain Motive
Jealousy
Starting Event
A secret in the agency is discovered
Random Events
A Soup strikes the ground
A Delivery Guy Spontaneously disintegrates
A Swarm of bees is heard screaming
A crow meets disaster
Local Business
Abraham's Mantle Mall
Nicky's Hat Properties
Obrien's Vase Collective
Lang's Oil Lamp Collective

Populate the World

Criminal Contacts
Johnny "short fingers"
Nicky "nice legs"
Tony "fat muscles"
Darnell "Teeny Mimosa"
Random People
Mariah Chan
Gabriella Ortiz
Theodore Obrien
Natalie Fitzgerald
Abraham Stewart
Dean Lang
Candace Pratt
Abel Gallagher
Descriptions
Journalist
Engineer
Depressed
Broker
Teacher

MISC Ideas

Magical Objects
Sickle of Annihilation
Bow of Irritation
Secret objects
Secret Mantle
Vase with a False bottom
Random objects
Oil Lamp
Rubber Plant
Metal chair
Toolbox
Locations
Pond
Shelter
Port
Palace
Destinations
Town of Wartrinstead
City of Athercheslin

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).